Evan’s Story
Evan’s Monumental Gifts was founded by Kiara and Eric Bollinger. In 2018 we were expecting our second child, a boy we would name Evan. Everyone was so excited, but after about our 3rd month of pregnancy, we found out he was not healthy.
Evan had Holoprosencephaly, which means his brain did not divide properly. After genetic testing, it was discovered that it was caused by an extra chromosome number 13. Trisomy 13. We chose to continue the pregnancy, despite pressure from others. We wanted to meet our son, even if just for a brief moment.
During our pregnancy we made every second count. We sang to Evan in the womb. We had a family journal where we wrote to him. Our older daughter read stories to him. We had family time, where we all told Evan about our day. He was a part of the family before he was born.
We made every memory we could, knowing that we did not know how much time we would have. Evan was born Jan 7, 2019. He lived for one week in the NICU. We spent all our time with him besides eating and sleeping. We got to hold him once per day and those were some of the best moments of our lives. Ultimately, despite trying all interventions and all that we could do with the knowledge we had available at that time, Evan passed away.
Our precious memories of spending time with Evan changed our lives. His nontraditional birth and short life, meant so much to us. But because of our tough experiences( Instead of buying a crib, we found ourselves picking out a burial plot and looking at headstones) we want to take some of the burden off of families who face the death of a child and who are in need.
We offer in memory of our son, a few choices of headstones that are paid for by our generous donors, or a little toward a headstone of your choice from Steckman’s memorials https://steckmansmemorials.com/. Evan lives on forever in the hearts of those that loved him and in the good deeds done in his name.
We also do some other community projects that will be posted here. We do an annual drive the past 3 years as Evan’s Christmas present and in the past, we have held support groups. Thank you for learning about our son and our program.
Our Whys
This mission is so important to us because we have been where you are. We lost our infant son Evan in 2019. Because of Evan, I know the drive that some parents have to make sure that their child’s memory and name is preserved through a monument.
I also had two other young family members that passed away when I was a child, that made a huge impact on my life. My close cousin Sara Mae Stoddard died in 2003, when I was 13 and she was 14. She had a terrible battle with Osteosarcoma (bone cancer)
Sara and I were very close growing up. We were always together. We liked to make dance routines and “perform” for our parents and our grandma. Sara was always full of sass. No matter how much pain she was in, she still had such a strong personality. She was so tough. She had all the qualities I wish I had, even to this day. Some days when I look in the mirror and I see her face in mine, I know that I have to keep her memory alive. She is my inner strength and toughness always. When I catch myself slacking in motivation, my inner Sara tells me to get it together.
Sara’s life was cut short, but she mattered. This project will also give back to families with older children, as well as babies like Evan. This is because Sara meant so much to me. She weighs on my heart so much and so heavy throughout the years.
At the same time my cousin Sara was battling Osteosarcoma, my aunt Georgia, had a baby born very prematurely. Frederick George Jr “Binkers” was his name. He was born in Feb of 2003. He spent much time in the hospital. He needed an organ transplant. (Read baby Freddie’s story here) My aunt and uncle went to the news to try and let other families know how important infant organ donation was to save babies like Freddie.
I tagged along with my aunt to see Freddie in the hospital in Pittsburgh. He was so lovable. I used to make faces at him. One time he made a face back and it was one of my most cherished memories. He enjoyed watching Elmo on TV and his mothers face most of all.
Unfortunately, Freddie did not receive his transplant and died in Aug 2004. Evan, Sara, and Freddie’s lives had a profound impact on my life and have motivated me to find ways I can help families through child losses of multiple types. When a family is dealing with the loss of a child, there are so many factors that may impact the ability to properly memorialize their child the way that they want to. The main being financial. Headstones can be expensive and out of budget for a lot of families. The empty space on top and the will to want them remembered is very tough to manage. I hope to be able to help many families with Evan’s Monumental Gifts in Evan, Sara and Freddie’s memory.